Reflection

I don't have enough time to work on the map, but I do have a little time to reflect upon my journey thus far.  I'm sitting here at the public library in Bedford, VA, about 10 miles from our campground on 43E.

My first thoughts when planning this trip were of adventure and reconnecting with Wilson through a shared experience...All of which is happening.  What I didn't expect and probably should have, was that I would also be on a path to a variety of self discoveries.

As I mentioned previously, the timing of this trip was based on a variety of reasons; my parents deaths, loss of job, house sale, etc.  While on this journey there have been several things that have happened that keep those things close to mind, many of which are in the form of dreams.  I've had several dreams about our house and visiting there with the new owners.  Most of them focus on the changes that they were making to the house.  Generally speaking I might think that the dreams would be anxiety producing based on the fact that I identify the house as my home and the home of my family...not so though...there was a sense of peace that they were loving it as we have loved it, just differently (why they painted everything blue is beyond me :)).  Of course in a couple of these dreams other members of my family happened to be living in the house and/or making changes even though we didn't own it any longer....I have thoughts about this, but perhaps another time.

I also had a dream where a friend of mine had lost their job and was having a difficult time of it.  No one really stood up for her and I felt as if I needed to do so, mostly because I had been there and done that.  It's difficult to process a loss that defines so much of who you are and what you do.  My job loss was based on a huge downsizing in the company, it wasn't anything I did or didn't do....it didn't make it any easier and I spent most of my time talking about how it worked out ok for me given where I was in life and what I wanted for next steps....although this was totally true, it almost felt as if I was trying to convince them....it's been over a year and I still have a hard time with it...I'm lucky though, because I'm doing something that I've dreamt about for a long time.

My parents are with me on this journey...I feel their presence often in spirit as well as things happening around me....For example - Daily Grind Coffee in Front Royal, our server's name was Wanda (my mother's name).  Watching the sunset at Big Meadows, we were joined by a group of young folks from MA, one of which was called JP (My father's initials found all over his vehicles and what many people called him), and driving by a car with the license plate of XJT 7778 (244-7778 was the phone number that I grew up with).  Strange....

One other thing that seems to bring this all together is the fact that I went to pull out a book of short stories that I brought with us and instead pulled out a book called Many Lives...Many Masters by Brian Weiss.  I don't remember packing it, but thought, I pulled it out, why not?  Weiss is a psychiatrist, hypnotherapist, and author who specializes in past life regression.  His research includes reincarnation, past life regression, future life progression, and survival of the human soul after death. (Wikipedia)....Anyway, one of the themes is that we live multiple lives and that within the various lives we are reincarnated with many of the same people who are also being reincarnated....We all have work to do in order to reach the next plane, etc....It's difficult to explain, but in the end if you believe in such things there is a peace that follows...I'm not 100% sure about reincarnation and past lives, but I do believe in a certain spiritual feeling that I am not alone and that those who I have loved and lost are still with me watching over me.  Reading this book brings me peace.  Even if you don't believe in such things, you might find it interesting...I suggest you read it.

What am I actually trying to say?  I'm not sure...other than this trip has been and I believe will continue to be something that is good for me and that I have lots to learn as long as I'm open to it....